Safari

By:  Garland Davis

Our ship was in Mombasa for a week. The Special Services Officer had set up a two-day camera safari in the Nairobi National Park which is unique as a protected area for a wide diversity of animal life. It is a successful rhino sanctuary and has an excellent record for supporting the species.

Since I had never been interested in the beer drinking and womanizing of my shipmates, the Chaplain’s assistant, a radioman that everyone suspected of being light in the loafers, the newest Ensign, and I signed up for the tour.

There was a tented camp within an enclosure where the tour overnighted. After dark, I was sitting outside my tent having a smoke listening to the animals in the night. The tour guide was also smoking before bed. He was in the tent beside me. He was telling me the names of the animals creating the sounds.

Suddenly there was a rumbling noise that shook the ground. Alarmed, I asked what it was. He said, “Not to worry. They are going the other way.”

“What is it?”, I asked.

“An elephant stampede.”, was his reply.

“Why, what causes them to stampede?”, I asked him.

He replied, “Probably some son-of-a-bitch upwind opened a can of peanuts.”