I wrote this one night after reading and thinking about what all the uncontrolled immigration is doing to our country.

Heavenly E-Mail

By: Garland Davis

From: stpeter@thegate.hvn.com
To: gabriel@archangel.hvn.com

Subj: Entrance Policy

Hey Gabe, you gotta talk to the boss.

I know talking to all those open border socialists from Boston and San Francisco made him rethink the concepts of a wall between heaven and hell. But since he opened the gates between here and there this place is literally going to hell. The immigrants say they are cold and have started breaking up the martyr’s crosses and angel’s harps to build fires. They keep poking the Seraphim with the pitchforks they carry with them. There is a group that calls themselves angels, but they eschew wings for motorcycles. Like I said, “this place is going to hell!”

Also, giving in to all the pet owners, so they could have their doggies and kitties by opening the gate to the lesser creatures is an unmitigated disaster. We have serpents, frogs and lizards crawling all over the place. We have ants in the manna, stray dogs crapping in the streets, and feral cats digging up the flower beds. And you should see what the elephants are leaving in the streets.  The vampire bats are scaring the crap out of the winged angels and they are threatening to unionize.

But the real disaster is the cockroaches. We are being overrun by fuckin’ cockroaches.

Gabe, you got to do something.

Pete

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A native of North Carolina, Garland Davis has lived in Hawaii since 1987. He always had a penchant for writing but did not seriously pursue it until recently. He is a graduate of Hawaii Pacific University, where he majored in Business Management. Garland is a thirty-year Navy retiree and service-connected Disabled Veteran.