The Rest of the Story
VFP-63 NAS Miramar
Now I never made a cruise with my friend PHCS Jerry Govia even though we were in the same squadron We were always in different Dets, but I did spend a lot of time on the water with him fishing, waiting for the fish to bite or in most cases not bite. We would pass the many hours just talking, telling stories I always enjoyed Jerry’s Story’s, he had that distinct Rural Arkansas mannerism that was both insightfully and amusing.
Now I was a single Senior Chief at the time (Between marriages). Jerry was a married Senior Chief with Kids. I tried to have as many female companions as I could bag while in port. Jerry, being married, sometimes like to hear about my exploits.
One day we got to conversing about the “sound” ones sexual partners emanate during love making. We talked about screamers and moaners, biters and scratcher’s, lovers and cursers and just about everything two Navy Chiefs could conjuror up sitting in a fishing boat.
Jerry remarked to me “You know Okie I like doing it with mirrors”
I was hesitant to pursue his statement “Mirrors” I repeated
He quickly added “You know those Concave mirrors– the ones that make things look bigger”
I let out a Nervous spontaneous laugh
Adding to his humors vein I asked “for whom– you or your partner”
He replied “Me of course”
He explained “I like to think of myself as one of those Macho mother fuckers– hung like a horse”
I had played right into his witty line of thought “Really” I injected
In that slow southern draw “Yeah you know take a big old dong and screw a woman until she passes out”
Jerry just laughs and spits a wad of tobacco in the water “No really I WISH, I could just once, screw a woman until she passes out, now that would take a Macho mother fucker to do something like that.”
Jerry asks me “Okie wouldn’t you like to do that just once?”
“Well it’s not on my to do list” I answered
You could tell it was on his list as he went back to fishing, chewing his tobacco, gazing out over the water.
Now it was April 1982 our squadron was decommissioning we had no aircraft left so for the rest of the time we had nothing to do work wise. Our Commanding Officer CDR Dave Beam was a 4.0 officer told us to go fishing, play golf, whatever. So we just mustered a few times a week then split.
When we weren’t fishing, us CPO’s would be over at the Chiefs Club gambling/playing shuffleboard, shooting pool, or playing ‘ship captain crew’ (a dice game).
One of the bartenders was a blond from Colorado named Mary. Now I had in the past had relations with Mary she was a good friend and could banter with the chiefs like an old hand. On one occasion I had gone home with her and during the height of our passion Mary passes clean out. I immediately think of Jerry’s wish, I imagine to myself (Man I’m a Macho-Mother-Fucker!!)
Our next fishing trip I’m telling Jerry about Mary Passing out. Jerry was really intrigued with the story so much so that the first chance he gets he goes to the Chiefs club to verify the story.
Jerry “Hey Mary can I ask you a question”
Jerry “Did you take Okie Bob home the other night?”
Mary “Sure did”
Jerry “He said you passed out on him”
Jerry was astonished! Mary was called away to tend to other customers. Leaving Jerry to weigh the magnitude of the testimonial.
Some more VFP-63 Chiefs drift in; they pretty well had a lock on the horse-shoe bar. Jerry tells the Chiefs about Mary and me.
I walk in and am greeted with a Chiefs chorus of “There that Macho-mother-fucker is”
I’m somewhat confused with the cat calling.
I sat next to Jerry. Jerry confesses that he had quizzed Mary about my claim.
Then I realize that Jerry has gone and told the whole Chiefs Mess my passing out story.
It was like I had taken his dream away from him having performed his wish with Mary!
Mary comes over and asks “Okie what’s all this Macho shit”
“I think Jerry’s got it stirred up,” I said
Mary tells Jerry “I had not finished with what we was talking about” She added “ I didn’t tell you why I passed out”
I was just a beaming thinking about the verification of my virility
Jerry “Go ahead” the whole horse-shoe Bar full of VFP-63 Chiefs got quiet was leaning forward listening.
Mary “Well it’s like this about 10 years ago I was in a car wreck and lost one of my lungs when Okie and me was going at it the other night and He was in the short strokes, He squeezed so hard, all the air left out of me—– so I passed out”
The bar broke out in a Hugh roar. My bubble burst, My one day of Macho fame evaporated!! Poooof!
A big old smile came back on Jerry’s face his wish had gained new life and as Paul Harvey use to say “Now that’s—– the rest of the story”