Shit Happens

Shit Happens


In the Beginning was the Plan, and then came the Assumptions, and the Assumptions were without form, and the Plan was without substance.

Darkness was upon the faces of the men and women. The men and women went unto their Leading Seaman and said, “This is a crock of shit and it stinks”

The Leading Seaman went unto the Petty Officers saying, “It is a pail of dung and we can’t live with the smell.”

The Petty Officers went unto the Chief Petty Officers saying, “It is a container of excrement and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it.”

The Chief Petty Officers went unto the Division Officer saying, “It is a vessel of fertilizer and none may abide its strength”

The Division Officer went unto the Department Head saying, “It contains that which aids plant growth and it is very strong.”

The Department Head went unto the Executive Officer saying, “It promotes growth and it is very powerful.”

The Executive Officer went unto the Captain and said, “This new plan will actively promote the growth and vigour of the Men and Women with very powerful effects.”

The Captain looked upon the Plan and saw that it was good, and said, “Make it so.”

The Plan became Policy.

That my friends, is how shit happens.



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